Tuesday, 30 July 2013

ABC Of Rainy Day Clothes From Evans

So... I hate to say it, but I think it might be over. Has summer really upped and left us? I think so! We had 2 weeks of pure, blissful sunshine where we all moaned it was too hot and that we couldn’t sleep... Seems like Mother Nature has listened to our moans and sent us rain, thunder and lightning - lovely!

The problem with this weather is that it is so interchangeable & unpredictable... I went for drinks one evening last week in a dress and flip-flops, by the time I was on my way home it was full thunder and lightning - not ideal!

So anyway, I thought would do a little piece on items that can be layered easily and are perfect for when the weather just doesn’t know what it is doing! As a plus-size retailer Evans really seem to have upped their game recently & I love some of the pieces they have bought out... Once my bank balance allows me I'll definitely be purchasing some to do some proper reviews for you

Absolute Bargain - Swan By Clements Ribeiro Lips Print Jersey Dress

On sale for just £15.00 this would make a fantastic addition to any wardrobe. What I love about this dress is that it is so easy to dress up or dress down. I can picture it with tights and a nice sparkly shrug for an evening out or leggings and a cardigan for on the day. As a jersey dress the material is going to be lightweight, so you can layer it without having to worry too much about being too warm in this weather. You can buy it here.

Best Value For Money - Scarlett & Jo Purple Waterfall Stud Detail Dress

At £40.00 this dress is a little more expensive that other items I put in the best value for money section, but I really do think that it fits here perfectly. I love the waterfall stud detail on this dress and feel that it is perfect for those nights when you want to wear a pretty dress but not something that screams "look at me" too much! I love many of the Scarlett & Jo pieces and can't wait to own one - I have seen reviews from other bloggers and know that they talk highly of the quality and fit of these products. You can buy this one here.

Cash To Splash - Scarlett & Jo Black and Grey Sheer Yoke Dress

I love, love, love the cut of this dress - it is exactly the cut and shape that I love to wear. At £55.00 it is a cash to splash item, but what a lovely choice! I love the black and grey pattern of this dress - it is perfect to wear to an evening party or get together, especially as you can easily get away with wearing a cardigan with this to protect you from the unpredictable weather. You can get this one here.

So there you have it - a couple of choices from Evans for this sunny, rainy and then sunny weather again!

What do you like to wear when the weather is unpredictable like this?

Debz xx

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Monday, 29 July 2013

Skater Girl Indulges

I know I rant quite a lot about body image issues, but as a BBW blog I feel it is important to also bring you plus size bargains and clothes that I like. I know that as a self-confessed fat chick it can be hard to fit clothes you like, that fit, that you can actually afford.

One of my new-found faves is ASOS Curve. I know I am quite late to the party with this website, but I really am loving everything that they have on offer at the moment.

Last week I picked up this bargain of a grey skater dress and decided to wear it to Club Indulge on Saturday.

Skater Dress With Sweetheart Neckline And Short Sleeve

I really like the fit of the dress and the fact that it is long enough to wear without leggings - although it would look pretty funky teamed up with leggings. That is the beauty of a dress like this, the choice is yours! I found it very flattering around the bust and it was more than comfortable to wear all night. I bought a size down from my usual size and it still fit fine. For just £15.00 in their current ASOS Curve sale, it really is a must have for any wardrobe. Get yours here

I teamed it up with my other new found love - a necklace from Black Heart Creatives. I have three of these now - I'll blog about my other favourite necklace another time. I got comments on my necklace all night long, with loads of other ladies wanting to get their hands on one!

I wore the outfit to Club Indulge - which is a relatively new plus size party that was held in London Bridge. Held in champagne bar right next to the Hilton Hotel the summer mixer event did threaten to be ruined by rain but actually the 4th Club Indulge was quite possibly my favourite one yet. The next one is at the end of August and if you haven't been to one before, I would recommend it!

The night did get a bit blurry - I blame the wine!
Dress: ASOS Curve
Shoes: Primark
Belt: Yours Clothing (old season)
Necklace: Black Heart Creatives

What did you get up to this weekend?

Debz x

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Sunday, 28 July 2013

How Important Is It To Be Liked? A Look At Social Networking

It pains me to say it, but I don't know much about growing up in this modern world - it has been a very, very long time since I was a teenager trying to find my place in this world. What I do know is that gone are the days when your main worry was being picked last for the rounder’s team during PE - whoever devised that as a good idea for school children needs a very stern talking too and possibly detention.

Now we have the whole new world of social media, whereby we're competing for likes and follows and shares on our photos and funny stories. If we post a photo and only 4 people like it, does that mean we're fat and ugly?

I am a social network whore, quite possibly to unhealthy limits but I love it! Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram - I have, use and love them all. 

However as an uncertain 14 year old I am not sure that my love of all of these pages would be the same? I can imagine being an unsure teenager and posting a photo of myself - if none of my classmates liked it, I can imagine the devastation that could follow. All you want is the guy that sits at the back of the class to notice your photo and like it - is that really too much to ask!? Gone are the days when you can imagine that he smiled at you and that would be enough - now we need the physical evidence that someone LIKES our photo almost as a validation that they like US! (I am talking in very broad terms here)...

Without being dramatic I can imagine it being a slippery slope - your classmate posts a photo of her pouting and wearing too much make up, you go one step further and post a photo in your bikini, or some proactive pose just to get more likes that her. It seems like harmless fun and in many cases it is - but I feel we should be teaching our younger generation that the only 'like' they really need in this world is their own! The truth is that as a 14 year old, the people we rely on so heavily to like our photos probably won’t be the same people we celebrate our first pregnancy with or when we sign our mortgage, so the grand scheme of things they really don't matter.

Then we have the flipside that the confusion of these photos can cause - a boy posts on your photo "wow, sexy" and you like it - have you given him permission to look you up and down and take in every inch of your body when you see him? No! But the posting of your photo and the liking of his comment might lead him to think so!

I am sure that there has always been proactive poses and boys calling girls sexy, but it seems to me (and I am by no means an expert) that this is so much in our faces now... Boys and growing up to be men who think it's ok to message a girl on a dating website and ask to see her tits or to pass her in a bar and smack her on the bottom. I know that this has absolutely always happened, but I think the openness of social networking has let the problem grow. We now have men who think that they can talk to women in a manner they would kill someone for, if they spoke to a female in their family in the same way - who think its ok to grope a woman as they walk past her however young she might be or to simply tell her she isn’t likeable enough. It is absoluetly not ok for men to do this and we need to make a stand and teach our children the right way to behave, so that they can grow up to be adults we're proud of - not lecherous men or unsure women, who behave in such a way that they're damaging other people with their actions.

I love, love, love social networking - the world of social media and bloggers has been an inspiration to me and so many others. It has bought me new friends and opportunities I never know - but I just hope that the trend of wanting 'likes' so badly doesn’t damage our younger generation, because as long as you love yourself the rest will fall into place - you do not need the validation of a certain number of Facebook likes to tell you that you are beautiful, any mirror anywhere will do that for you.

What have your experiences online been like?

Debz xx

P.S I fully understand that this article is in very broad terms and that both genders can be affected in much the same way. I am no expert in this field and this is just an opinion piece and nothing more - thanks for reading!

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Friday, 26 July 2013

The Baffling World Of Online Dating...

I know I have blogged about this subject before and I know without a doubt that I will blog about this subject again.

As I have been sat in tonight (on a Friday of all days!)  I thought I would log into a dating site or two and see what was happening.

First I decided to give Plenty of Fish some attention... and that bought this gem out of the woodwork.

And then, as dating websites often do a BBW dating website I am on bought an old 'friend' out of the woodwork. I would love to say that this is a rarity, but unfortunately it is not.

This conversation is copy and pasted direct from the site - It is, unbelievably a conversation that actually happened.

Him :how are you then tonight ?xxx

Me:  You do realise that the first time we spoke you were extremely abusive to me? Why 
would I chat to you again?

Him: i dont remember that, but if i was then im sorry, of course being online and keep getting let down all the time, sometimes puts people in a foul mood, im sure i didnt mean to take it out on you. sometimes i get moody. i dont mean to. recently ive been looking for work again, so of course being let down all the time makes me down in the dumps lol.

Me:  Oh. I remember... and last time I reminded you of it (when you messaged me again - this is the 3rd time) you blamed your friend for using your account.
You told me I was too fat and that I would never get a boyfriend unless i lost some weight - whatever foul mood you were in, there is no need for that so I really have no motivation to have a conversation with you!

Him:  shame as i actually think your quite pretty as you are.xxx

Me: Perhaps you shouldnt have told me that I was too fat to ever get a boyfriend then.

Him: well, i dont think you are.i would love someone as nice as you on my arm.xx
that was cruel of me and im not normally like that, i assure you. truly not.xx

Me:  I couldn't care less to be honest with you. I don't have friends who are judgemental of others let alone potential dates.

Him: Well i would love to date you, really would.xx

Me: I would recommend that in future girls you find attractive and would like to date, you try not to put down their looks and damage their self esteem by telling them they will never be good enough for a guy - you'll have much better luck with getting them to agree to go out with you.

Him:  well, i hope you except that im sorry and let me get to know you ?xxxx

Me: No. 

I am not sure what it is about dating websites that let men (and probably women, I haven’t dated them so I don’t know) say what they want without having to worry about it... The above gentleman only abused me the first time after he has asked me out and I didn’t reply quickly enough to his messages or with the answers that he wanted - there is nothing quite like a man scorned!

Between him and the offer to take hardcore drugs with a stranger on a Friday night I am left wondering if online dating could work for me.

I would love to hear your online dating experiences!

Debz xx

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Body Bashing Doesn't Just Happen To You!

First of all, thank you to everyone who read, shared, liked and promoted my 'Open Letter to OK Magazine' article - over 1300 people have read my blog since yesterday - thank you so much! If you're new to The (Not So) Secret Diary Of A Wannabe Princess, then hi!

Yesterday I had quite a few messages and comments from people who agreed with me, that body bashing is not OK - although it seems that not everyone thinks and feels the same way!

After a night out last night I logged onto Facebook to see that a gentleman felt the need to body bash a beautiful group of ladies. A friend of mine manages a girl band called Concrete Rose and they excitedly posted some photos of their gig up last night on Facebook
Concrete Rose & Shayne Ward at their gig last night!
It is quite obvious, even at first glance that these ladies are beautiful - but it seems that not everyone agrees!

I have blocked out his name,
but the comment is still on the Facebook page ;)
I have blocked out his name,
but the comment is still on the Facebook page ;)

I think sometimes it takes something like this for me to take a step back and realise that everyone can encounter the same problems as me. It is sometimes easy to assume that the only people judged for the way they look at the people who don't meet the medias standard of beautiful - yet here you have a group of beautiful, thin, smiley, talented girls and still a man attempts to bring them down because of the way that they look.

The truth is that when it comes to body issues and body bashing - all of us suffer! There are so many people out there that want to bring others down for the way that they look - and not just if you're too fat. So many people it seems live their lives judging people for the way that they look and by the looks of it, it takes the bravery of being behind a computer screen for people to come out and say these nasty, spiteful needless things.

So, whoever you are - whatever you look like - hold your head up high and love who you are. We are all fighting the same battle when it comes to body bashing and feeling confident, so recognise your strengths and ignore those that try to bring you down.


Debz xx

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Thursday, 25 July 2013

Someone Tell OK Magazine That Body Bashing Is Not OK!

Dear OK Magazine.

As a BBW Blog I write about a lot of issues surrounding body image, positivity and generally learning to love yourself. Unfortunately in our already very judgemental society it is often a case of 1 step forward and 2 steps back because of publications such as yourself. I did not expect to be writing about the royal baby... but you have really made me feel like I have to!

I understand that our nation is image obsessed and that in order to sell copies of your magazine you want to report on what you think that people want to read. I even understand to an extent when you want to report about celebrities who have lost or gained weight, because that is after all what you think your readership want to read!

But OK Magazine, it is NOT OK to make a nation of new mothers feel like they are not good enough because they have not sprung back into shape. When I saw the front page of your Royal Baby special magazine I cringed a little but it didn't get my back up - maybe it should have, but maybe we are just so used to seeing magazine reporting how new mothers should be fit and back into their tightest jeans within months. I saw your magazine being reported online and simply rolled my eyes that you would release a special addition of your magazine on the day the royal baby was born, simply about how this bundle of joys mother should get back into shape straight away.

And then, this morning I woke up to social networking websites reporting on a (now deleted) tweet and I was flabbergasted that you think it is OK to send something like that - although, maybe the fact that the tweet has been deleted shows that you know that body bashing a brand new mother who gave birth just 26 hours before is not OK!

Living in this world is tough - the obsession with body image is growing and as a publication that sells thousands of copies a week you have a massive bearing on how people feel about things like this. When you send disgusting tweets like this, you send a generation of new mums into panic because they too have a body that shows the evidence of the new life they have created.

Kate took brave steps that most of us do not have to do; she walked out to hundreds of cameras wanting to broadcast her body to the world. She knew that millions (if not billions) were waiting to see what she looked like... and who wants to do that just a day after they have given birth? To send a tweet out that hints towards her looking like she has given birth to more than one person is a disgrace and I cannot understand why you haven’t already issued an apology.

I hope for every expectant mothers and every new mothers sake you see the error of your ways, apologise quickly and tell them that their miracle bodies are absolutely in their right to show the world that they gave birth to a baby and that there is no pressure for anyone to lose weight, tone up, fit back into their jeans quickly.

Take note OK Magazine, because what you did is far from OK!

Debz x

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Tuesday, 23 July 2013

ABC Of Summer Dresses From Excite Clothing

Thanks to the wonder of Facebook and some lovely plus size bloggers, I have recently stumbled across the Excite Clothing website. The website seems to stock a wide range of items, in a whole range of sizes so if you're looking for a new online retailer to try then I would say it is well worth checking them out! 

I have yet to order from Excite Clothing yet, you can blame my bank balance for that! However, if I were to order - here are my ABC picks of dresses for the summer.

Absolute Bargain - Printed Chiffon Dress

I really really love this particular print of the dress, but if you click the link then you will see it comes in 3 varieties, all of which are really nice. For less than £15.00 I honestly think this dress is a complete bargain. I love the fact that it would be long enough to wear as a dress, but still nice enough to be dressed with leggings or tights if you wanted to. Teamed up with some statement jewellery and a pair of pretty sandals I think it would be a lovely addition to any wardrobe. You can buy this dress here:

Best Value For Money - Metallic Skater Dress

I actually have this dress in black which I bought from eBay just before Christmas. I really like the fact that it is sparkly but not over the top. I wore it to a Christmas party and it was long enough to not need leggings or tights under it, although it would be fine with them if you preferred. The dress is usually £19.99 but is on offer at the money so you can even save yourself a pretty penny if you decide to buy it. You can buy this dress here:

Cash To Splash - Pink Pleated Sheer Panel Dress

At less than £30.00 the dress is hardly going to break the bank and it is lovely! I love the fact that it has an elasticated waist as I feel that this gives the best/most flattering fit for me. However it was the bright pink that made this dress stand out for me and I would definitely love a dress like this in my wardrobe! You can buy this dress here:

I will get around to purchasing from Excite Clothing and do a proper review, but for now these are my ABC picks of dresses for summer.

Have you bought from them before, what did you think?

Debz xx

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Thursday, 18 July 2013

Loving Lovedrobe Dresses - As Easy As ABC!

Thanks to Twitter I have discovered a brand new shop that does pretty dresses up to a size 32 - YAY! Although the fact that I want pretty much every item of clothing on their website isn't quite so good - damn my inability to win the lottery!

Anyway, it has been a while since I did an ABC feature on the website, so I thought I would do it on Lovedrobe seeing as they have so many nice pieces to choose from. I have yet to buy from the site (I will!) so this is just going on look although Twitter feedback from others is good!

Seeing as we're in the midst of a heat wave that shows no sign of letting up, I thought I would do a feature on summer dresses I liked on the Lovedrobe website!

Absolute Bargain

Ladies Black/Multi Leaf Design Rouched Waist Dress

I really like the unusual pattern on this dress and I think the colours work well. At just £15 for this amazing dress it is the perfect way to be able to add a splash of colour to your wardrobe this summer. What I like most about this dress is that you will easily be able to dress it up or down for almost any occasion. I can really see it being dressed with leggings and sandals for a relaxed summer evening out or even put with linen trousers and smart shoes for a more formal event. 

Best Value For Money

Multi Colour and Width Sailor Stripe Dress

I really, really like the multi width stripes on this dress as I feel it gives the dress a nicer, friendlier tone that if all the stripes were the same size. I haven't got this dress but I have others in similar cuts and I find them really flattering and comfortable to wear. I really like the fact that it comes in at the waist and is elasticised around the bust which gives someone with a similar shape to me support and a flattering shape. You can easily dress this up with leggings and sandals and I can see it being worn with some really nice statement jewellery. 

Cash To Splash

Koko Coral and Stone Geometric Patterned Dress

Unsurprisingly this dress caught the eye of a couple of bloggers at the recent Lovedrobe bloggers event, I really like the cut and style of this dress - especially after seeing it on the bloggers and how it fits them. It is a really flattering cost and even though it is under my cash to splash section, it is available for less than £40! 

Having reviews these dresses and spent time going over the clothes available on the Lovedrobe website (all in the name of research honestly) I really cannot wait to be able to purchase a couple of items, check out the fit & post up some proper reviews and photos for you! 

Have you tried Lovedrobe? What are your experiences?


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Where Can I Buy Confidence?

Some of you may have seen that I was quoted in The DailyTelegraphs Wonder Woman section last week...

“Debz, 30, is an internet marketer, who also runs a plus size fashion blog Wannabe Princess. She knows Miranda through Twitter (there’s definitely a scene) and loves Club Indulge, although she says her size doesn’t put her off going to mainstream nights.

“I’d go anywhere, I don’t really care, but we all come along to this together, so it’s a good opportunity to see people.” Although she admits: “If I can’t fit past someone here, I’ll tell them to move, whereas in a normal club I’d feel like I had to squeeze past or go the long way round.””

Apart from learning that I probably shouldn't talk to journalists when I am drunk, I was glad to have a link to my blog & some new visitors - Hiiii!

Anyway, I guess write-ups like this lead to 'normal' people discovering blogs and BBW websites etc. because it is something that they wouldn't usually Google to find.

I had a lovely email from a lady the day after the article and it made me realise that the blogs that we all write (And I don't mean this in a big myself up way - I mean it generically across the board) are doing some good!

" I stumbled accross your site through an article in a paper about BBW night clubs. I was so happy to see this, you look so confident and your clothes are fab.... I feel that in my life long quest to be thin I have wasted so much time on being unhappy being fat. I have so much more confidence now as I used to feel succesful when im thin and unsuccessful when im fat! I am learning to accept me as a big person, not easy though, any tips please, I love your style and confidence. xx"

I wrote back to the lovely lady (Hello if you are reading this) but it made me think, how exactly do you 'get' confidence?

This has been saved on my computer for years, I do not know the original source - sorry!

A few years back one of the biggest things for me was realising that many people suffer with the same body image issues - whether they're 'justified' or not. I started to post body positivity quotes that I liked on my Facebook and I was surprised at the number of friends that related to what I was saying. I always thought my thin, beautiful friends would never understand how I felt but actually in this image-conscious world we are all fighting the same battle.

What was also a big step for me was realising that if people wanted to pick on something about your image/look/style they will - they'll call you out for wearing glasses, or having the wrong haircut or having the wrong clothes.

This has been saved on my computer for years, I do not know the original source - sorry!

However the truth is that these people don't own me - they don't have any bearing on my life or the good memories I make with the people who do matter. Someone might make a comment in a nightclub or while I am out, but they are the ones who spend their night concentrating on others - I am usually so happy to be out with people I care about that I don't even register other people’s negativity.

I am not saying I am 100% confident - who is!! But what I am saying is that any issues I do have are just that - my own issues. I do not have to let any ill confidences I feel about my body have a negative effect on my life - or even my day. 

Whatever size clothes you wear, you deserve to be happy & have good people in your life, so never let the haters bring you down!

This has been saved on my computer for years, I do not know the original source - sorry!

I hope you're enjoying the sunshine

Debz xx

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Wednesday, 10 July 2013

My First Ever ASOS Curve Purchase

When I read about the ASOS Curve last week, I had to make a purchase. Having never bought from ASOS  Curve before I wasn't 100% sure what to buy - but in the end I opted for 3 new dresses... I know, surprising! haha

My bargain purchase came a few days later, all packed lovely and securely - How exciting!

A little sneak peak of what I bought! ;)
My favourite dress from the 3 I bought (I'll more than likely blog about them all at some point) was the T-Shirt Dress In Letter Print that was a bargain at £13.00 in the sale!

I decided to wear it out on Saturday night and really liked the fit. As I am quite short, it was just the right length for me to wear as a dress without leggings, exactly what I needed for the heatwave that we experienced this weekend.

I liked the lightweight material of the dress, which made it comfortable to wear all night.
I put the photos up on Facebook the next day and someone pointed out there is an unfortunate choice of words across the front, made up in the random pattern in the lettering. ASOS Curve have apologised, refunded my money and assured me that it isn't the same on every dress!

All in all, despite the word in the pattern (which once you see it, you can't help but notice it every time) I was really impressed with the dress & the service I received from ASOS and so would definitely recommend them and their clothes to anyone looking for somewhere new to shop.

Have you shopped at ASOS Curve before, what did you think?

Debz xx

Friday, 5 July 2013

ABC of Summer Clothing Choices From Yours Clothing

Well, rumours have it that we’re in for a sunny weekend – and if these rumours prove to be false then I am not going to be happy! I have a picnic to attend on Sunday, and if I can’t laze about in the sunshine sun-bathing off my inevitable hangover I won’t be happy!

Anyway, with this picnic planning my friends and I have been discussing what we’re going to wear ... I think one of my new tops from Belgium are going to finally get an outing.

I love the selection of summer clothes that Yours Clothing offer... so here is my ABC of summer clothes from Yours Clothing!

Absolute Bargain 

Butterfly print tunic with frill neckline and shirred waist - £18.00

I am a sucker for pretty patterned and this top ticks every box. I really like the cut of this top and it looks like it would be very comfortable to wear. The sleeves give a bit of cover up for anyone who is a little conscious and doesn’t want to show the tops of their arms off too much. I love the pink colour in this top and think it would look lovely teamed with some ¾ length leggings and pretty sandals of flip flops. Great for a summer evening in a pub garden or an afternoon picnicking somewhere - and under £20.00! You can buy it here.

Best Value For Money

Indigo denim short with rolled legs and gold studs - £22.00
I really like these shorts because they allow your legs to get a bit of sunshine, but you don’t have to worry too much about the fact you are wearing shorts. I have some very similar to these but if I didn’t then I would definitely be investing in a pair. For just over £20.00 these are a fantastic addition to any summer wardrobe. The great thing about denim shorts is that they can be dressed with almost anything so over the summer months you’ll be able to get loads of wear out of them – ensuring that they’re great value for money. You can buy these here.

Cash To Splash

Coral and black embellished double layer dress - £22.00

Yours Clothing always offer affordable pieces, so it is hard to find something on their website that is cash-splashing worthy. This coral and black dress caught my eye because I really liked the shade of coral in the top half of the dress. I really love dresses like this which have a different colour on each half – I think they are flattering for every shape and make everyone look great. If you have a summer party to attend then this would be great, especially because the cut allows you to easily team it up with a shrug if you’re out in the evening and start to feel the coolness of the evening air. You can buy this here.

Whatever you’re up to this summer – enjoy!

Does anyone have any exciting plans?