Showing posts with label body confidence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label body confidence. Show all posts

Saturday, 3 January 2015

Your Body Doesn't Come With Buts...

Last night I watched the Katie Hopkins documentary and to be honest with you, I just found it a bit dull. I fully expected to be writing a blog post rant about how angry she made me but I just can't find it in me. She said nothing new, shed a few tears about how she understood people more now and then sent offensive tweets to just about anyone who would listen - Dull, Dull and Duller!

However, over the last few days I have seen advert after advert of TV fat programs - The Shut-Ins on Channel 4 and a program about fat people on benefits on Channel 5, all coming up in the next week or so. On top of Katies's part two tomorrow and re-runs of My Big Fat Fetish.

They're designed to be sensationalist, to tell you that overweight people are bad and that as a fat person you should strive to lose weight... As if being bombarded with weight loss product adverts throughout January wasn't enough.

I don't want to talk about them too much, I am sure it is easy to guess how I feel about them!

However... I am here to tell you that your body doesn't come with buts....

It is not only OK to be 'fat but healthy', you can be fat in anyway you want. If you don't want to be fat any more and want to diet instead, that is OK too!

You don't have to be striving to lose weight. You don't to give excuses for your body... You don't have to claim to be too busy to lose weight or too poor to buy healthy food. You can be just the way you are without having to give people a reason why! You don't need to be fat 'but only because I have *** illness".

You don't have to be 'fat but I exercise alot".You're allowed to be fat with NO JUSTIFICATION at all!

Your body. Your Rules. Your happiness comes first. Without exception.

Debz x


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Tuesday, 30 September 2014

Loving You, Is Easy Because You're Beautiful

A few days ago I read this post by Lucia at U Can't Wear That and it really stirred something up inside me. If you haven't read it yet, please take 5 minutes out to read it, you won't regret it!

As plus size bloggers it can sometimes seem easy for us to put on a pretty dress, smile for the camera and 'be confident', but the truth is that it doesn't always come that easy. In fact I would say for most of us the journey to loving our bodies has been a long and varied one - with many people not knowing they would ever be in the position of loving their body just as much as they do - but it's proof you can get there! This is a bit of a rambly post, not sure where it's heading or if it even has much point, but I'll publish it anyway!

I honestly think that my confidence came with age - it came with the knowledge that although some people can be cruel most of the time people don't care if you're a fat body in a tight dress or whether you're covering up your calves with leggings - they're too busy going about their own business to pay much attention to you. 

However, as Lucia said it would be lovely to live in a world where we don't need to develop like fine wine and get 'better' with age, but instead grow up loving our bodies and being confident in our skin from the get-go. But how do we get there?


Have you ever looked in the mirror and thought that you shouldn't wear what you were wearing because you were too fat, too thin or had the wrong shaped body to pull of such a look? If you have, then you are far from alone! Now imagine your friends thinking that about themselves, ludicrous isn't it! Could you imagine saying any of the things you say to yourself, to your sister, your mother or your friend? The truth is that the horrible words you say to yourself, your loved ones are saying to themselves too and we need to make it stop!




Loving yourself is amazing and feeling confident in your own skin is something that money really can not buy. It's about more than pretty dresses and having access to a varied wardrobe of clothes - its about knowing you can put on any of those clothes and shine. It's about not being scared to walk into a pub on your own (we've all been there) or staying home because you 'have nothing to wear'. Yes, we all have those days and yes we all fight with our wardrobes on Saturday night trying on a thousand dresses only to end up with our original choice - but it is possible to do that with a body you love and are comfortable in.

I have spoken before and I will again about the importance of positive and varied media. I read Heat Magazine and I can't resist Chat Mag, but I also read plus size media, look at art containing disabled bodies, listen to poetry about body positivity and so much more. I honestly believe it has shaped me a life of being happy in my very big body and I can tell you now it's an amazing position to be in.

Much like Lucia in her article, I can only hope that we can all get there - in this world it isn't always easy but it is possible. Be a little easier on yourselves & compliment each other - we're the only ones who can build ourselves up instead of dragging each other down!

Leave someone you love a compliment today!

Debz xx

Sunday, 14 September 2014

When A Former Fat Girls 'Tells Us Like It Is'

Dear Vicky Chandler

Here I was, spending a Sunday morning on my sofa catching up on Sunday Brunch when someone tweeted a link out to your article (For those who haven't seen the 10 Fashion Staples Every Plus Size Girl Should Own article you can read that here).



I must say I found in quite enlightening, I had no idea that as a short, fat girl I should avoid wearing ankle boots or that pencil skirts should be a certain pattern depending on my size. Of course, I already knew that my fat body should never be dressed up with horizontal stripes - every fat girl knows that rule.

I had no idea that the shape of my jeans mattered to a stranger on the internet, who would spend their time writing an article to tell me that delicate necklaces are a no no or that I shouldn't wear tops with a spaghetti strap - WHO KNEW!

I am of course, being a sarcastic little princess today because I think you, your rules and your body shaming are disgraceful. I feel sad for you that you need to write an article on how strangers should or shouldn't dress. Your weight loss is great and I am happy for you that you are happier in your skin  but just because when you were 5 stone heavier you wouldn't wear halternecks or thought that you looked bad in cropped length jacket that doesn't mean that your rules fit everyone.

So... Just to prove my point I put a call out to the people who live a life breaking your silly, pointless rules & just look how good they look whilst they do it!!

Rule: "steer clear of wide legged jeans if most of your weight is carried on your bottom half.. FYI NO SUPER SKINNY"

Skinny jeans on Arched Eyebrow

Rule: "Big designs are a no-no..."

Leah from thirtysomethingcurvyme.com
I stay right away from big designs.... *Sigh*
Rule: "Stripes are the hardest pattern to tackle, but the key is to avoid horizontal ones"
Meeeee!
Emily from http://www.fashion-north.com/


Kim from Call Me Kim looking good in stripes!
Laura from http://laurapantslifestyle.blogspot.co.uk/

Rule: "I’m afraid that studs and delicate necklaces just don’t cut it"

Embedded image permalink
Kathryn in studs and a delicate neck chain  - shock horror!


I love Lauras studs!
Georgine Horne breaks some more rules!
Rule: "Pencil skirts... If you’re bigger on the bottom half, stick to a solid colour, preferably darker, and pair this with a lighter coloured top. If you’re slimmer on the bottom and want more of a curved effect, a brighter, more daring pattern will do just the trick."
Kathyrn looking great!


A pencil skirt AND ankle boots from Georgina at http://www.shemightbeloved.com/ - Sin City!

Rule: RE Jackets "Avoid anything cropped and instead opt for hip length and longer"

Kathryn from http://www.misskathrynsmisstakes.co.uk/ in a great cropped jacket!

Oh Leah, not a cropped jacket AND stripes. Tut tut! ;)


Hannah from http://fabulouslyfatfashion.com/

Rule: "Not to state the obvious, here, but spaghetti straps and halter necks don’t do us any favours"
Georgina from Fuller Figure Fuller Bust - Spaghetti Straps, Halterneck and a moustache - winner!
Halterneck - OOPS!
Spaghetti straps - Oh no!
The lovely Mags from Twitter and friends


Urmm.. Straps!! Lucia at www.ucantwearthat.com

Rule: "PLEASE, avoid ankle boots that seem to cut your height in half"
I see no problem with ankle boots here!
Sarah from http://plussizeproud.wordpress.com/ breaking the 'rules' as usual!
Leah from http://justmeleah.co.uk/

Ladies (and gents) STOP listening to these rules complied by strangers to tell you what you should and should not be wearing.


If you put something on and YOU think YOU look good and you like it on YOUR body that is all that matters. If you don't like ankle boots or halternecks that is fine too - your body your rules! And as these photos  show - the rules people make up mean nothing anyway because they look FABULOUS!


Do you have pics that break these rules?? I'd love to see! Send them to me on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter and use the hashtag #IBreakPlusSizeRules



A massive thank you to all the bloggers who raided old outfit posts, instagrams, dropboxes and more to help me put together this amazing collection of photos - you're all rule breakers and I couldn't be prouder! Some of the photos might be in a mismatch order because they came through so thick and fast on Twitter and Facebook. I couldn't use them all but they were all brilliant! Lots of them were hard to know where to place on the rules, because you all break numerous rules within one outfit - love it!
Debz xx

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Friday, 18 July 2014

Plus Size Fashion - Why Aren't We Reading From The Same Page?

Last week I was sent an infographic from a PR company - nothing new there. However this one was about plus size summer trends and what we should and should not be wearing. It contained handy tips like do not wear a crop top with low-cut jeans or don't wear two peplum items together. I told them that this was nonsense and that if they had read my blog they would see that their 'advice' was everything that I stood against. I thought nothing more of it - until I saw a post where a girl had posted the infographic and that she AGREED with them - I was horrified!! I don't want to link to the post here, as this isn't a personal attack on anyone - but it was a general do and do list of what a plus size lady should wear. 

And I Get Dressed...

There has been a hashtag floating around lately of "And I Get Dressed" and this made me think of that. When I get dressed in the morning I wear the clothes that I like and the styles that I want to wear for me. I don't worry about whether someone else is going to feel uncomfortable because I am wearing shorts or whether the top I am wearing is considered flattering. I get that people won't like what I am wearing always and that sometimes I wear things other people wouldn't - but surely that is the beauty of fashion? I love the way I dress, it's a relatively new discovery for me to wear clothes I am passionate about and I don't intend to stop!




Maybe I am naive in thinking that the world of plus size bloggers think the same as me. Maybe it is silly to believe that we're fighting from the same corner for everyone to EffYourBeautyStandards and wear the clothes that they want to wear. I generally didn't think I would see a plus size blog telling me "And then there are some summer trends that we just shouldn't be a part of, for example, the booty shorts trend. "

If I want to wear booty shorts - why shouldn't I? How is the fact that I choose to wear a certain style of clothing wrong to you? If you don't want to wear them - that is OK! Just as it is more than OK that I want to wear them.

I know that as a plus size person I often have to battle against media influences in order to dress how I want and live the life I choose, but I honestly didn't realise that I was also fighting against other plus size people for the right to dress how I want.

To anyone who feels that I shouldn't wear "clingy fabrics like nylon and spandex" I am sorry that my body makes you feel uncomfortable. I am not sorry for wearing what I choose to wear, I am just sorry that the shape of someone's body and the material they choose to put on it is something that makes you feel so passionate that you need to write about it. I hope one day, you'll learn (like many of us have had to) that all bodies are good bodies and that the only body and clothing you should worry about is your own.

Debz

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Friday, 11 July 2014

How On Earth Do Your Love Yourself?

This week a post on the Fuller Figure Fuller Bust Facebook page got me thinking again! With the likes of Linda Kelsey and Katie Hopkins fighting in the opposite corner to us, how is it really possible to love ourselves? I know that body image troubles come in all shapes and sizes and that you don't have to be fat to have doubts about your self worth, but sometimes it seems the media is particularly against those that are overweight.

A post on Georgina's Facebook page was a question from a reader of hers asking about confidence and how to get more of it!


For me, a massive part of the journey to loving my body has been surrounding myself with a new type of media. Every day we are surrounded by media that tells us that our hair should be a different colour, we should be dressed in a different way and that our clothes should have a small size label attached to them. If our bodies dont meet those standards then the media bombards us with hints and tips on who to style ourselves on and how to get a bikini body! It's tough to fight against all of that, when that is all we see!


A few years ago I discovered a whole new world of media that is helpful and brings us up rather than drags us down. Now I regularly discover new articles, poetry, books, journalists, photos and more that work towards helping people love their bodies!


I thought I would share some of my favourites here, so feel free to have a read!


This post by Natasha Devon about health vs weight makes a fantastic read.

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/natasha-devon/body-image-and-health_b_5573580.html

And this video by Meghan Trainor is a fun(not to be taken too seriously) look at loving your body if it is larger.




Twitter and Tumblr are full of quotes like the below, just search for tags like #Bodyimage to find them

Browse Instagram to see what people like Tess Munster, Honor Curves and many more have to say! Their pages are often full of positive words and pictures, so well worth checking out. Inclduing hashtags such as #EffYourBeautyStandards and #HonorMyCurves

Samatha Peterson has some fantastic things to say here http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/03/samantha-peterson-slam-poetry_n_5438474.html

Artists like Carol Rossetti have some amazing, body-positive pieces of art like the one below




And there are hundreds more like them! I try to share any that I come across on my Facebook page, so feel free to come and give me a like if you want to see more. In general the media doesn't tell us anything positive, instead they want us to buy into not being good enough. Take responsibility and surround yourself with a much better, more positive media - you'll notice the difference, I promise!


Do you know any body positive influencers? Share them with me!!


Debz xx


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Thursday, 12 June 2014

My Body Is Not Brave

So.. summer is on it's way(hopefully to stay!) and it comes to that time of year when we all like to flash the flesh. I have to admit that I love wearing skirts without leggings, shorts and t shirts and of course my beloved flip flops! For me, the hot weather is so much easier - no worrying about layering up and what you are going to wear to keep warm and dry. Instead you can just put on almost anything and you are good to go!




However, being plus size/fat/curvy/large whatever you want to call it dressing in this way is going to get you some reactions. One of the reactions that always baffles me is the "Wow, you look great you are so brave" or "I love this outfit, I wish I was as brave as you". I know that these compliments come from a good place, so I try not to feel disappointed at them, but invariably - I do!




As far as I am concerened, there is nothing brave about wearing clothes! My body is not a battle ground to be debated and there is nothing brave to me when it comes to choosing the clothes that I want to wear. If someone doesn't want to wear the type of clothes that I do that is fine, but I choose to wear them because I like them and not because I am brave!




When you get messages along the lines of "WOW, how did you learn to be so confident" I know they come from a place of good, but they also baffle me... Is it really so baffling that someone who looks like me can love their body? If you don't love yours then I am sorry and I really hope that one day you learn to, but being so shocked and surprised that I love me... That isn't good! Why is it such a surprise that I am confident in my skin? Usually because deep down people don't feel I should be... and that isn't a good way of thinking.




If you feel happier covering up this summer then that is fine, but I'll be getting out my pale, chubby body parts and there is nothing brave about that!





What will you be wearing this summer?


I would love to see your #MyBodyisNotBrave so share then on Instagram with the hashtag so I can check them out!!
Debz xx

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Tuesday, 3 December 2013

Little Me - What Would You Say?

This week while reading some of my favourite blogs, I stumbled across the 'Love EVERY Body' project arranged by the lovely Leah over at http://justmeleah.blogspot.co.uk/. This week I saw people writing letters to their body, what they wanted to thank it for, blame it for, apologise for etc. but most of all what they wanted to love it for.




Then my sister published a blog post about her weight loss journey and how it hasn't made her happier. Yes, she is happier in a sense but not in another - weight loss, dieting and self love is a long journey and somewhat of a roller coaster.


"If anyone ever tells you being thin or a certain dress size will make you happy then they are lying. However you felt about your body and the insecurities you had before your weight loss will be the same no matter how your outward appearance changes."


Over recent weeks, one of my favourite songs has been Little Me, by Little Mix. I love the song, but I also love the message that it presses - that one day, you'll look back and want to tell yourself that everything will be OK.


"Wish I knew back then, What I know now, Wish I could somehow, Go back in time and maybe listen to my own advice. I'd tell her to speak up, tell her to shout out, Talk a bit louder, be a bit prouder, Tell her she's beautiful, wonderful, Everything she doesn't see"



I often get messages asking me how I became so confident, how I can be so happy with the way I look and whether my self-body-love is real! I don't really have the answers - only that Yes, I do like myself and I think you should like yourself! The only real thing I have to say on that is that lots of people think the same as you! There are people out there, who you see as perfect who feel just as unhappy with the shape of their body. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

 So, if you could tell your 'little you' anything, what would you say?


I would tell my 15 year old self that everything will be OK, I'd tell my 21 year old self that moving up North will be the best decision you ever make and I would tell my 26 year old self that everything happens for a reason. I would tell myself as a teenager that one day you'll love yourself and as a twenty year old, you'll learn to embrace your body and like it! 

What about you?

Debz xx

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Thursday, 21 November 2013

Dear Angela Epstein - An Open Letter



Dear Angela Epstein

I read your recent article on Best Daily and I feel I had to write to you (for anyone who hasn't read the 'Having Fat Friends is Such Hard Work'article, you can do so here).

Firstly, I find it disappointing that you find any of your friends hard work. Friendship should be something that makes your life nicer - not harder. However, when I look at the reasons why you find your friendships such hard work  - I am left flabbergasted.

Rather than condemning your friend for trying to do the 'right' thing and order a salad - why not tell her that you love her, just as she is - and that she should order the Welsh Rarebit if she wants to. Reassure her that life is worth far more than worrying about the size of her jeans! Tell her that you want her to enjoy her afternoon without worrying - and that IT IS OK to order exactly what she wants for lunch.


Do you know why your friends are seemingly hard work? Because everywhere you turn, the world tells you that you should hate yourself for being fat. When you open magazines who tell you to drop a dress size before Christmas and when you go on websites for clothes who tell you that you are too big for their range - they're all telling you that your body is not OK, and that you should change it.

When you're up against this sort of hard work it can be tough to say... "I am OK just as I am, and I do not need to change", so you live in this sort of eternal turmoil which leads you to eat a salad at lunch and then a pizza at dinner because you hate yourself for not feeling that the salad was enough.

And throughout all of this - do you know what you should be able to do? You should be able to speak to your friends, feel their love and support and to know that they love you no matter what.

Rather than spending your time writing hateful articles for Best Daily why don't you spend your time telling your friends that being the size they are is OK - they if they want to order Welsh Rarebit they can and that is OK. Perhaps then, when they feel a little more confident in their body image you'll have less hard work to put up with and can put your efforts into being a proper friend, who supports them no matter what they weight.

The world can be a hard place - why would you want to make it harder for your friends to love themselves with your cruel words? If your friends are "hard work" do them a favour and find yourself some new ones. Just make sure they are thin, because we all know thin people have no problems or dramas so will give you a happy, stress free friendship...

Debz x


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Tuesday, 19 November 2013

Taking Body Positive Influences From All Over

Evening :)

If you have read my blog before then you will have seen that I love finding positive body image sources from all over. I have linked to different people before and I think it's important to surround yourself with positive stuff, where possible. I am not saying it's a miracle cure, but I am very happy and content in the skin I am in - and for years I have sought out, collected, watched and shared positive images, videos and sayings... I guess the two are related!

Anyway, when I find pieces that I like, I want to share them because I think its important for people to have places they can stumble across little rays of sunshine when they didn't expect it - so here you go!



Carrie Hope Fletcher

The little sister of Tom McFly has had a YouTube channel for a while now. I don't pretend to know lots of facts about her but I do love her singing voice! Anyway, last week she released this video of her talking about body image, her own body and how she feels about confidence etc. I really enjoyed watching it and I hope you will too! :)



Hollie McNish

I have blogged about Hollie before and my love of her poems. This week I was reminded of her words when I found out that some of her poetry was being used for Dove adverts. 

My favourite of hers is a poem called "WOW"


One of her Dove advert ones can be seen/heard here:




I love all of these pieces - and a couple more by Hollie McNish. As ever I love Mary Lambert, Natasha Devon and so many other people!

Surrounding myself with positive influences like this really helps me to be happy with who I am... 

What do you do to help yourself with body confidence? Do you find people influential to the way you feel about your body?

I'd love to know your thoughts!

Debz 

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Wednesday, 13 November 2013

Hard Out Here - Is It What We Really Need?

You know me - I love anything that is body image positive, especially those people who use arts, music, poems etc to get their message across.

I have to admit that I heard about Lily Allens song long before I actually listened to it. With people quoting it's lyrics on Twitter and shouting about how great it was that Lily Allen had waxed lyrical about an issue that is so close to our hearts.





I read the lyrics and really loved what I read:



"If I tell you about my sex life

You call me a slut
Them boys be talking about their bitches
No one's making a fuss"


"You're not a size six

And you're not good looking
Well, you better be rich
Or be real good at cooking
You should probably lose some weight
'Cause we can't see your bones
You should probably fix your face
Or you'll end up on your own
Don't you want to have somebody who objectifies you?
Have you thought about your bar who's gonna tear it in two?
We've never had it so good, uh huh
We're out of the woods
And if you can't detect the sarcasm
You've misunderstood"

I listened to the song and I have to confess to liking it - catchy melody and lyrics I can relate to, what more does a song need?


And then I read a tweet from Pop Idol winner Michelle McManus



And she linked to this newspaper article from a few years ago


Now, I guess you could say that if Lily Allen thought she did look fat, then comparing it to someone else could be a good way of getting her point across... But then is dragging another female into a story about your own negative body image really a good step to take?

I have had a little play on Google and have also come across an open letter Lily Allen penned to Cheryl Cole a few years ago.

"Cheryl, if you're reading this, I may not be as pretty as you, but at least I write and sing my own songs without the aid of Auto-Tune," she said. "I must say, taking your clothes off, doing sexy dancing and marrying a rich footballer must be very gratifying, your mother must be so proud, stupid bitch." 

Cheryl posted back saying "I have had enough of her and her big mouth," she said. "Over the last few months she has called [Girls Aloud bandmate Nicola Roberts] ugly, which I bit my tongue over. She called [other bandmate Sarah Harding] vile and my husband horrendous, but seems to have conveniently forgotten all of that." 

So it seems that Lily perhaps hasn't always been as kind as she could have been... Since then she is said to have made peace with Cheryl, saying 

So.. is it OK to be calling other females ugly and then a few years later releasing a song about image and 'setting the bar' of what you should look like? I say, yes. After all, we're all entitled to change and we all grow as people. If she has embraced beauty and can now write about issues such as "You should probably lose some weight, cause we can't see your bones" then good for her!

I really love that Lily Allen has recorded a song about body image and her take on the music industry, I just hope it is for all the right reasons! I love positive body image and I wish more people in the public eye would speak up about it and tell people it is OK to have a body, whatever size that is, that doesn't fit the media norm...I just hope that it's a permanent change in her outlook and we won't be reading negative stories from her in the future

What do you think?

Debz xx

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Friday, 25 October 2013

You Are More Beautiful Than You Think

Discovered this on twitter tonight. I loved it! The world sees you very differently than you see yourself... You are beautiful, love yourself always!! 


Monday, 7 October 2013

Let Your Haters Be Your Motivators!

This weekend I had to witness some wicked comments on Facebook which got me thinking! I won't link to the page they were on, or reference them too much as I really do not want to give it anymore promotion than it needs.

On a BBW Facebook page, someone posted a photo of a lady in a BBW night club in a tight, short dress. The larger lady was showing some flesh, but radiated confidence. I should point out that the lady was NOT looking at the camera and as far as I can tell doesnt know the photo was taken, let alone posted by someone else on a Facebook group - which itself upset me!

However, it was actually the comments on this page that upset me the most! Ladies were SO quick to knock this other lady down. Comments about how trashy she looked, how her outfit was 'so wrong' and how she should have some self respect and wear something else. People were commenting that her outfit was inappropriate and that she should not go out in public like that, because it is not what people want to see!

My comments about how we dont dress for other people and how we should stand together as one fell on mostly deaf ears - and what a shame that is! Not only do I feel that we should all respect eachother anyway, but as a BBW group I found it upsetting that larger ladies would put down someone larger for wearing what they want. 

Yes, the dress with tight and short. Yes, she showed off some flesh. Yes, it might not be something would I would wear - but who cares what they lady wears! What she does with her life and what her clothing choices, make no difference to me and my day! This lady was at a BBW night club, not a shopping trip to Asda, so let her wear what she wants to I say!

And then today - I posted this photo on Instagram!



I know, a photo of me in a pretty dress is not unusual, so you wouldn't think it would be such a big deal, but i think you'll see from these screen grabs that not everyone agrees! (I would usually block out a name, but seeing as these comments were made on a public forum (Instagram) and can be seen my anyone (my Instagram isn't private) I have chosen not to)









I have no problem at all with this lady and her life style choices, I don't even care if she looks at me and thinks I am disgusting - but what scares me is how quick she is to comment on a photo of someone she doesn't know just to try and bash them down?


The world is a big, bad scary place. The media tell us all the time that we're not good enough, that we should lose a dress size in two weeks or that we should get a bikini body for summer. All of this is thrown in our faces almost unavoidably - and I don't care, I am happy in my skin and I don't want to change. But why do ladies like the one above feel that they can comment on me and my lifestyle? Even if she doesn't understand me and my choices, I am just a stranger to her - what do I matter?

Ladies (and gentlemen), use your haters as your motivators! These people who want to rip you down and make you feel unworthy - DO NOT LET THEM! You are amazing and beautiful and don't let the world tell you otherwise. Spend time with your friends, cherish your family, buy pretty dresses whatever your size, eat too much, sleep too much, dance too much, slut drop until your thighs hurt but whatever you do, do not let them steal your shine - because you are worth more than you could even imagine!

Debz xx


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